Coalition of Conservative Christians to Boycott Crusty
James McAveney - Christian Media Association
Just this morning a coalition of conservative Christians launched fresh criticism and boycott against Crusty the Cat. They will reportedly ask members of their congregations not to vote to him at church services tomorrow morning.
As revealed by a recent FactCheck.org observation, it was discovered that Crusty doesn't wear underwear (or pants for that matter).
Evangelical leader Missy Lou McCluckett was distraught over the discovery. "Why would you go running for public office naked from the waist down? We need a candidate who thinks about the children, who respects decency, and isn't some type of back alley pervert!"
We asked McCluckett about the 'pervert' remark, believing it was perhaps an exaggeration, but that only fueled her outrage. "Listen here - Crusty is a dirty cat. His shirt says 'SWINGERS', which is an obvious reference to his open relationship and alternative lifestyle. I can't believe anyone would advertise such sin and polygamy like that, but I guess he lets everything else dangle out so why not?"
"I refuse to let someone like that waltz right into the Oval Office without taking a stand. We're fixin' to stop him tomorrow by letting everyone in our churches know how bathed in sin he is, and how he makes the baby Jesus cry".
Crusty the Cat, a member of the Church of Catterday Saints, could not be reached for comment.
James McAveney - Christian Media Association
As revealed by a recent FactCheck.org observation, it was discovered that Crusty doesn't wear underwear (or pants for that matter).
Evangelical leader Missy Lou McCluckett was distraught over the discovery. "Why would you go running for public office naked from the waist down? We need a candidate who thinks about the children, who respects decency, and isn't some type of back alley pervert!"
We asked McCluckett about the 'pervert' remark, believing it was perhaps an exaggeration, but that only fueled her outrage. "Listen here - Crusty is a dirty cat. His shirt says 'SWINGERS', which is an obvious reference to his open relationship and alternative lifestyle. I can't believe anyone would advertise such sin and polygamy like that, but I guess he lets everything else dangle out so why not?"
"I refuse to let someone like that waltz right into the Oval Office without taking a stand. We're fixin' to stop him tomorrow by letting everyone in our churches know how bathed in sin he is, and how he makes the baby Jesus cry".
Crusty the Cat, a member of the Church of Catterday Saints, could not be reached for comment.